Bizarre does not begin to describe this turning of the collective stomach of Californians, who are known to have the strongest one around. They have stomached bad leadership for a very long time, and now they will get to try on a governor who can't even pronounce orgy much less join one for all of his apparent trying. Poor Arnold! He evidently had to exaggerate his sexual exploits to keep his public persona desirable in the hard business of celebrity image management. Poor, poor Arnold! Most Hollywood stars have less of a problem finding sexual satisfaction, but apparently, in his case, it is a difficult issue. At least he says so and he is telling the truth these days, isn't he?

I stand in wonder at the convolutions of the Republican minds that are supporting this guy for Governor. He is not quite everything that Bill Clinton was. No Rhodes Scholar, but he is a Hollywood star, a macho man and a rich, rich person. Arnold is a success story without becoming governor, is that not enough. Do we have to elevate him to governor to demonstrate the Peter Principle once again? Will we be singing the Governor Groper blues for the next three years? Or do we have to order up another recall? It sounds like a bad sound bite for Alzheimer's disease, Recall the Recall. If President Bush had an ounce of sense he would rush the troops out of Iraq and put them to patrolling the California borders. If this spreads we could have an outbreak of wannabe politicians rushing to grope enough women to become electable. Why we could even have an actor candidate for President from the Republican Party. Or worse, one who was at one time an actor without any real acting ability. It boggles the mind to think of all the possible ways this could affect the nation. We might even have a few cable TV hours dedicated to groping techniques of the truly successful groper.

I have little trouble picturing the California assembly, a real collection of adzes if ever there was one. Not a sharp tool in the lot. They are sitting raptly at attention while Arnold regales them with his State of the State address. The problem with this picture is it keeps morphing into a bad rerun of the latest Terminator movie in which the computers take over the nuclear arms and destroy most of the human race. It was really a bad movie, for those of you who haven't seen it, save your money. Arnold as Governor Groper will certainly be far more interesting. As they say in the training that we all receive at our guru's knee, "be careful what you wish for, you may get it". God bless the Republican Party for shouldering the burden of an ungovernable California. Atlas would be crushed under the load of bad legislation and worse initiatives that really govern this state. His Arnold action figure stand-in will certainly be at risk of that fate no matter how much time he has spent in a gym preparing to be governor.

The folly and glory of Democracy is that anyone can become a politician; we could have a very interesting future ahead of us. We could easily find enough child molesters to fill the school boards. We have already found enough business advocates to fill the roles of our regulators. We are quickly advancing toward a society in which anyone can be elected or appointed to any office at all as long as they have a party endorsement. The only real requirements are name recognition and a gifted spinmeister who turns your liabilities into assets. Rumplestiltskin must be working for Arnold. The political base of both parties will vote for anyone as long as they are told who to vote for. That is the power and glory of party politics at its worst, and Governor Groper is the result we are facing here in California. We will muddle through and not slip quietly into the Pacific out of embarrassment regardless of what happens in this election. "Governor Groper", it even has a pleasant poetic sound to it. Every time I think this is as bad as things could get, they get worse, and that, grasshopper, is the real secret of life. Never, never, never say, "how bad could it be?" it could always get worse. God bless and keep you all safe in these grasping groping unbelievable all too easy to recall times.